Friday, March 16, 2012

A rerun from 10/12/2011 Underware Bomber

http://www.cnn.com/2011/US/10/12/michigan.underwear.bomber/index.html?hpt=hp_t2

ACK! Today at work I ask a co worker "What makes a man SO dedicated that he would put a bomb NEXT to" his man parts? The answer I got was what I was thinking...."I have NO IDEA!". Even when I was young, foolish and in the military, I wasn't dedicated enough to put a BOMB next to MY tender man parts......

IF that kind of dedication is what it will take to win the war on terror, I'm not sure we, as a country, have what it takes to win this war.

The above statements are a joke of sorts BUT you have to admit, it takes a very brave or very foolish person to even THINK about putting a bomb ANYPLACE on their person KNOWING that when it goes BOOM, you either have a bad burn Or you DIE.  In this day and age of video games, you can die lots of times in a game and bounce right back. In real life it isn't so easy. DEATH is permanent. Military Snipers say "One Shot, One Kill" but as far as life is concerned it's "One Shot, One Life".  This isn't a dress rehearsal we are in, this is the big stage we are on right now.

I know of NOTHING in my life I have ever been so dedicated too that would have made me consider making myself into a bomb.  If Randi ask me tomorrow to strap a bomb on my  midsection, I would have to walk away from her and call the cops.....

We live in a great country but we have had an all volunteer military force for 30 or so years. Seems more people are telling their kids NOT to join the military than ever before.  It was good enough for Granddad but it isn't good enough for your son or daughter.  I understand that problem.  When my son, Christopher, told me "Dad, I've joined the Air Force" the first thing out of my mouth was "Boy, do you KNOW there is a war going on?"  He did know there was a war going on and being raised around the military, like I was, he was a darn site more informed than most people that enlist in the military.

YES, the military will send you too college and will give you 30 days paid vacation a year (if your duty section has the manpower on hand to allow you to take the time for classes or vacation, you can do all of that but if they don't you can't! Something the recruiters won't tell young recruits) BUT when they say its time to get on the aircraft and GO halfway around the world.....you have to go.  G.I. stands for "government issue" and they OWN you as long as you are on active duty.  They can't ask you to do anything against the law....but war sometimes makes the legal part of life VERY fuzzy. If you do an action on one place on a map, it might be OK but if you cross the border to another country and do the very same action, that could then be considered against the law and in the fog of war,  you sometimes lose track of just where you are at in this world...hmmmmm

We, as a country, are in war with a  most dedicated adversary.  They don't care if we are black or white, democrat or republican or if we love our families or not...

Something to think about.....

J.

Saturday, March 3, 2012

3/3/2012 Top 10 things they teach in waitress school

Tonight, Rand and I went out to eat at a local location of a nation restaurant chain.  We ask that the appetizer be boxed up for the trip home.  When the waitress came back with the boxed and bagged up appetizer, she ask me "Do you want to put that beside you?"....Well...she didn't ask me a question while my mouth was full but she did try to hand me a bag while my HANDS were full. Hmmmm Ok. I'll put down my fork and the salt shaker to pay attention to the bag you are handing me.  I looked across the table at Randi and said "That would make a perfect ACK....the top 10 things they teach in Waitress School"

SOOOOOOO in honor of my afternoon lunch/dinner, without further delay:

The Top 10 things they teach in Waitress School.
10. Talk SO fast that slow moving southern people can't understand you.
9. Come and check on the table every five minutes so you can interrupt the conversation
8. Come and check on the table every 30 minutes so they run out of EVERYTHING before you come back
7. Act so very uninterested that you forget what the order is before you get it written down. 
6. Act so VERY VERY cheerful that sugar drips off your every word.
5. No one drinks coffee anymore so ignore that empty coffee cup but refill the Diet Coke glass 3 times before you notice the empty coffee cup.
4. Mix up the tickets of your tables, no one will notice they have the wrong ticket.
3. Chew gum while taking the order, popping your gum very loudly the whole time.
2. Talk to your favorite customers VERY loudly about your dog getting "fixed" with such exact details such as the Dr. who did the work, the price for the "fixing" and the after "fixing" home bound rest routine and dressing changes, pus color and stitch care for the first two weeks......  
1. Wait until everyone at the table has their mouth full and then run around to the table and ask in a VERY cheerful voice "Is everything OK here folks?" and then run away while all are choking to answer you.

For as much as this is tongue and cheek, ALL of these have happened to us at one point in time or another.  When #2 on the list happened, we talked to the manager and gave her SUCH detail of the conversation her waitress was having with a customer that her mouth flopped open and she said "Are you serious?" Yes, we were VERY serious.....it did happen and it didn't make me want to wolf down my food with wild abandon and leave a large tip either! And to think, we walked into that place some months later and that same blabby waitress had been made assistant manager....ACK! As Mr. Sulu would say "Oh MY"

Ok, ACK among yourselves.

J.